I Often Ask Myself Why I Still Use Film… Then I Use Film.

I Often Ask Myself Why I Still Use Film… Then I Use Film.

The instigator for this post is the arrival of my third Cinestill TCS1000.

No fault of Cinestill. After a heavy year of use my first unit packed it in with an error code that could not be diagnosed so they sent me another. This last one was a self own. Sure, I diligently washed off the TCS1000 after every use as instructed, but somehow I managed to completely overlook the descaling instructions immediately after.

RIF girls and boys.

(Old head reference from oldy times TV.)

In my haste, I did not read the full instructions. Self own. So I bought another. When it arrived I asked myself.

Why do I still shoot film?

I will say right up front I have no logical reason for doing so. All of my usual “reasons” do not hold water anymore.

The experience.

That old chestnut. Loading film. The not knowing. The development process. You know. The analog things. Making you slow down. Making you be more selective about your pics. Ok… These are still valid.

The “look”.

I used to say digital was soulless. The images, while technically perfect, lacked the soulfulness I see in film images. I put this in quotes because two digital solutions have challenged this line of thinking for me. Neither are what could be deemed mainstream offerings.

Foveon family.

Images are chock full of soul in my eyes.

It even brings some of the limitations outlined in the experience section above. Takes a month of Sundays to write to the card so I have stopped bothering with reviewing images at all. ISO above 400 for color and 800 for B&W are not recommended.

Similar to film it also brings nondestructive Infrared photography to the table by removing the hot mirror. Want infrared? Change the “film” or capturing medium with one quick step.

The 12 year old M.

Though I struggled with actually pulling the trigger and even then only did so with my wife’s encouragement I must say that this camera has exceeded all of my expectations. A large part of my film allegiance was my love (There I finally said it.) of rangefinders and up to this point not having access to a digital option. So film it was until now. But more importantly it has a look that is quite special to me. I will not say t looks like film. But the images are full of that soul stuff I was talking about. Warm and very pleasing to my eye rather than more clinical.

If you do not see it or do not see the big deal, good for you. Run away. Ignore all of this and enjoy.

I can not with a clear conscious recommend either digital solution above. They are digital implements aimed at those with film sensibilities. The paper specification cost to benefit matrix fails miserably compared to more traditional offerings. A limited audience.

So… If these are floating my boat why do I still use film?… No logic involved going forward for the record.

I want to.

Whether it is the tactile whirring clicking and clacking, the feeling of accomplishment of realizing you did not hose the roll when you pull the film off of the reel I just like it. I like all of it.

Yes. It occasionally breaks my heart a little. The rare occasion where I unfurl a blank, underexposed, overexposed, or otherwise ruined negative is a gut punch.

For example the chorus I sing with was in a short film. Getting ready for low light I loaded ISO 3200 film in a camera I had never used 3200 film with before. Hubris. And I paid. Or so I thought. What I was disappointed with at first ended up getting some great reactions from others. I am not a big grain head, But others helped me appreciate what was created. And now I genuinely like the pics.

So oddly not knowing what will happen also makes it kind of exciting.

Alternatively, when everything is firing properly it can be a continual string of dopamine hits. The film is in. It is winding properly. Whether it be manual or automatic I like the sound of advancing film. Hitting the end of the film. Even rewinding the film. Then on to all the pleasant sensations of developing your own film. The zen of blindly spooling the film on the reel and putting it in the tank in the dark bag. The concentration required to watch the clock and spin or invert the tank. The rinsing, the drying, the scanning. I love all of it…

So. That is it.

When sitting and idly reflecting on the process it makes no sense.

It is the process of doing that makes it all make sense.

Even though it does not make sense.

Because it is not about making sense.

I must acknowledge that after many years of trying to make sense of everything…

…that everything does not need to make sense.

It is about enjoying myself. It is about seeking fleeting moments of joy.

And that it does.

No more needs to be said.

When this joy is no more I may stop.

When the trouble outweighs the reward I may stop.

I am sure I will ask myself this again time and time again.

Digital often seems based in logic. Film not so much. And that is ok.

For now I will take all of the analog joy I can get my hands on.

Happy capturing.

-ELW